Alternative Leaving Suggestions Please!

It's my leaving party tomorrow - booked the swanky cocktail club - tick! Organised the outfit - tick. Organised the bacon butty for my last Friday morning in this office - tick. So I need to organise a nice little thank you to all my friends and collegues. So I did some researching and came across the following checklist, it's like an idiots guide to how to go out...... top tip, book a table if you are going for a meal! Anyway, thought I should devise an alternative leaving do list.......... please help

Leaving 'do' checklist - By the idiots

• Identify who you want to say goodbye to and a suitable venue for this farewell
• If you are going for a meal, book a table
• Allow for the giving and receiving of leaving presents, ie. have a bag with you
• Camera, with film and batteries, to take photos of your guests
• Tissues, should it all become too much
• Time. Don't let it be a big rush. Give yourself enough time to spend with your family and friends who you won't be seeing for a while

Alternative leaving do checklist - By Me

* Check the barmen at the club are qualified hotties and know how to make a Brixton Riot!
* Go to Nando's for lunch to make sure not drinking copius amounts on an empty stomach - for some reason this behaviour does not agree with me.
* All gifts will be gratefully received but they won't be coming out to the club ... that's a recipe for disaster at the rate I loss things. Not nicknamed the snail trail for nothing - leave a path of possessions behind me, sometimes never to see them again! Miss my diamond necklace.
* Tissues are essential - already had a moment today when I realised my gorgeous friends won't be around me when I move to my new job. I know I will make new ones - it's all good. Leaving is always a tearjerker - think Pretty Woman when Julia says goodbye to Kit! "Take care of you" x
* Wear preventitive beer goggles - it is bound to get messy and I have been known to be a bit affection with the occassional boy around the time of ten to two - we all are! Not just me. It's not big and it's not clever. I get bored of dancing ha ha!
* Make sure not to wear masacra - it could get a bit water damaged when the tears and the laughter take full effect. There will be lots of fun.
* Prepare in my head which songs I want to sing on the random karoke machine we attack in the early hours - I can guarantee, black velvet - winning!
* Party feet! My favourite shoes have developed "I hate you" aversion with my feet. Never has it happened before but a couple of weeks ago while out on a brilliant night in Manchester my feet had a fight with my shoes and the latter won.
* Practise my dance moves tonight........ someone remembered that I use to do the splits as my party piece - Claire and Carol you are my partners in crime for that little trick. Tomorrow will mark the end of an era for myself, Smithy, Hester & Brianceau - let the dance off commence.

Anyway, think that is my checklist in order but please feel free to add anything! Discuss.

Thanks for tuning in.

Stan xx